Negative Guild

[Rich]

And now that it has an official thread, all discussion of this game will officially cease...
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Never criticize a man until you walk a mile in their shoes. Then not only are you a mile away, but you got their shoes.

[Bloo Driver]

I dunno, I'm likely to crack open the copy I bought for Kim and give it a whirl if the woman doesn't start playing the damn thing herself.
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Don't say another Goddamn word. Up until now, I've been polite. If you say anything else - word one - I will kill myself. And when my tainted spirit finds its destination, I will topple the master of that dark place. From my black throne, I will lash together a machine of bone and blood, and fueled by my hatred for you this fear engine will bore a hole between this world and that one.

When it begins, you will hear the sound of children screaming, as though from a great distance. A smoking orb of nothing will grow above your bed, and from it will emerge a thousand starving crows. As I slip through the widening maw in my new form, you will catch only a glimpse of my radiance before you are incinerated. Then, as tears of bubbling pitch stream down my face, my dark work will begin.

I will open one of my six mouths, and I will sing the song that ends the Earth.

- Tycho, Penny Arcade

[Rich]

That will damage the pretense that you bought it for her!

Pretend you are just looking at the character creator and ask her if she'd like you to "Make a guy for her."
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Never criticize a man until you walk a mile in their shoes. Then not only are you a mile away, but you got their shoes.

[DanMonster]

Sex sells

Warning, Spoilers? NSFW if you work somewhere lame.

Link

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[Bloo Driver]

The music sounded like Enya and the guy looked surprised the whole time. That was the least sexy sex interlude ever.
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Don't say another Goddamn word. Up until now, I've been polite. If you say anything else - word one - I will kill myself. And when my tainted spirit finds its destination, I will topple the master of that dark place. From my black throne, I will lash together a machine of bone and blood, and fueled by my hatred for you this fear engine will bore a hole between this world and that one.

When it begins, you will hear the sound of children screaming, as though from a great distance. A smoking orb of nothing will grow above your bed, and from it will emerge a thousand starving crows. As I slip through the widening maw in my new form, you will catch only a glimpse of my radiance before you are incinerated. Then, as tears of bubbling pitch stream down my face, my dark work will begin.

I will open one of my six mouths, and I will sing the song that ends the Earth.

- Tycho, Penny Arcade

[Rokku]

I'm not at the end of the game yet, but I'm torn on how to end it. Having my warden survive for the expansion or starting an entirely new warden both appeal to me for various reasons.

If I didn't like Alistair so much, I'd just pick up Loghain and make him take the bullet for me.
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It's like a ninja-man/ had sex with The Hulk/ and gave birth to some kinda crazy Ninja-Hulk!

[Rokku]

[Rich]

Here's the irony with Loghain...

If you HATE Loghain, and want him to die, then the only way to GUARANTEE he will take the bullet for you is to build up your rep with him. (Note that sometimes he seems to do it anyway even if he hates you. He's a weird guy.)


And, if you talk to Loghain a lot, you can easily talk him into dying for you. But then, you learn about him, and it really is hard to hate him (at least if you pay attention to what he says). He honestly had excellent reasons for doing what he did.


LOGHAIN SPOILERS


Basically, Loghain is a patriot. He does what's best for Ferelden, always. Not the King. Not himself. Ferelden. Remember, when he grew up, there was no king. He supported King Maric because it was for the good of Ferelden. He broke up with his first real love, Rowan, because the King needed a wife of noble blood and there weren't a lot of options.

But that's okay, because Loghain is a patriot, and it was all for the good of Ferelden. He gave up his entire youth learning to fight the Orlesians, who had more or less crushed his homeland and treated its inhabitants like complete shit. (Oddly you learn a lot of this by having Loghain talk to Dog, of all fucking people.) There wouldn't even BE a King if it weren't for this dude. He killed the Orlesian Emperor and told the rest of them to get the fuck out. Then he let Maric take the credit, because it was for the good of Ferelden.

Why does he hate the Gray Wardens? Because the last time there were Gray Wardens in Ferelden, they tried to murder the king. That's why they were exiled. Sure, that was a crappy king, but Loghain never knew the guy personally. He just knows the Gray Wardens were rebels. (And they were. If you do Warden's Keep, you find out the Wardens were a bunch of douchebags back then.)

Essentially, the Orlesians were the worst thing to ever happen to Ferelden. The Darkspawn, in comparison, are a fairy tale. The last Blight was hundreds of years ago, and the way it ended, most folks were certain there wouldn't be any more. When the Gray Warden first arrives at Ostagar, they make a big deal out of the fact that the few encounters they have had with the Darkspawn thus far have been total routs.

And yet, King Cailan, who has proven himself to be a pale shadow of his dad (Loghain's daughter ruled the country in all but name), wants to go to the Orlesians for help. Why does he want to do this? Because a Gray Warden told him to. By the way, this Gray Warden isn't even a full-blooded Ferelden. A foreigner, from a brotherhood of regicides, wants to ally with the empire's greatest enemies to fight a fucking fairy tale? It's no wonder Loghain abandoned him. Cailan was an idiot. He just happened to be an idiot who, through total coincidence, was doing the right thing for once in his life.

The only real things wrong with Loghain are:

1) He has a terrible temper. This much is obvious whenever you interact with him. It only makes the bad things worse.

2) He trusted Arl Howe.

Howe was the one responsible for doing most of the really fucked up evil shit that Loghain got blamed for (like hiring Zevran, selling the elves, killing the Couslands). Sure, Loghain signed the checks and gave his approval, but by that time the plan had so much momentum that Loghain really had no other choice than admitting his mistake and stepping aside, which would have disgraced his daughter as well, and pretty much ruined any chance she had of staying in power. He couldn't just sever his ties to Howe, as Howe's soldiers had taken over the capital. Loghain was fucking surrounded by the guy, who was hiding in Loghain's shadow because Loghain had a fucking awesome reputation (the guy was a damned superhero).

Oh, and by the way, if he did had said "Fuck it" and done the right thing and stepped down, who would most likely have been the next person in line for the throne?

Oh, that's right. Howe.

Consider this: when you kill Howe and when you kill Loghain, what are the last things they say?

Loghain says good-bye to his daughter and gets one of the best, if sappiest, lines in the game as he regretfully tells her goodbye. He doesn't even give a shit that he's dying anymore, because Ferelden is in good hands. He just wants Anora to know he loves her.

Howe says "I DESERVED MORE." and dies in a pile of Tim Curry sneer.


if the above went on a bit long, it's because Loghain is probably my favorite hero-turned-villain-turned-hero in any game, ever. compared to most video game villains, he's ridiculously complex.
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Never criticize a man until you walk a mile in their shoes. Then not only are you a mile away, but you got their shoes.

[Rich]

Also: if Loghain joins you, make sure you let him talk to Lelianna (who is Orlesian). Oh man, the fucking venom.
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Never criticize a man until you walk a mile in their shoes. Then not only are you a mile away, but you got their shoes.

[Shawn Carman]

That wicker bikini she's wearing seems like it would be uncomfortable.

[Rokku]

[Rich]

You just want to roll around in Antivan whoooooooores.
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Never criticize a man until you walk a mile in their shoes. Then not only are you a mile away, but you got their shoes.

[Rokku]

[kintaran]

And then they will stab you repeatedly because half of Antiva is Crows.
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Kintaran, Serailye (BH)
Kintaran, Meiraena, Quessya, Kintarae, Nylarravel, Kintarak (FM)

[saskafey]

has anyone picked the you choose option at the whore house? I thought it was kinda funny.